My New Roommates.. My Grandparents

This story takes place several years ago but its too good not to tell.

My Grandpa, several family members, and I were in the living room to discussing how great Netflix is. All of sudden my Grandpa jumps into the conversation and burst out “I fucking hate Netflix… they send me the worst God damn movies.”

My Grandma hears  this from the kitchen and comes into the living room and responds: “Lester, Im the one thats been ordering the movies!”

My Grandpa had thought Netflix sends you random movies… My Grandma forgot to inform him of that.

My cousin slept over last week. He informed us that he would have a lady sleeping over. My Grandpa burst out and said “The only person that has sex in this house is me!”

One of the best parts about living with my Grandpa is that he just loves to come with my on rides. It doesn’t matter where I am heading.

He came with me to get a haircut last week. He yelled at me because I paid too much for it. He said “I have this woman that cuts my hair for $7, you could have just gone to her instead of paying all that fucking money!” I responded back “Grandpa, I need to get ‘solid’ haircuts! I’m in sales, I need to look professional plus you barely have any hair” He responds back “Good point, your right”

3 weeks ago I needed to go sign a lease at my shore house in Manasquan. Its a 90min trek each way. It was on a Sunday and I told him I was heading out to the shore. He asked “can I come?” I said of course. The dude has an endless amount of amazing stories (Ill get into these on later post)… and I’m not sure I thought I would ever say this… but I think he surpasses Howard Stern in the category of ‘Car Entertainment’

Lester Bornstein & Ben in Manasquan

And last week I went to the gym and my Grandpa wanted to get out of the house and join me. He just sat there and watched me work out at the cross fit gym I go to… Actually I take that back. He spent 40% of the time talking to the female trainer (#MackingIt) and the rest of the time trying to work his new IPhone. Not sure if you going to find a cooler 88 year old than this man.

My grandparents have probably the first ever wireless land phone ever made. It was probably bought in 1978 and my Grandpa was wavering on if he should get a new one at Best Buy because this phone clearly doesn’t work anymore.

I said “Grandpa, just buy a new one, they cost like $30. This one is old as shit. Ill take you to Best Buy now.  Just throw this in the garbage”

He responded back “Im old as shit, are you going to throw me out?”

My Grandpa just got an Iphone for his birthday. Prior to this phone, he had a flip phone from my guestimations was purchased when Mambo #5 was #1 on the billboard charts. The transition has been difficult for him and teaching him how to work it is as comical as it sounds. Its just too funny witnessing him just being blown away by all the features.

Last week my Grandpa saids to me “Do you want to Facetime with me?”  I responded back, “Sounds good Grandpa, but you know we live together?”

A couple of  days ago, I told him that he needs to charge it because its at 7% battery life. He responds back at me “Are you talking about me or my Iphone?”

The dude is just too cute.

The season finale of the Bachelor was on a couple of weeks ago. I had no idea they even watched it! But as they were watching, they held hands and they went back and forth over and over telling each other “isn’t this the best Bachelor couple you’ve seen in the history of this show?!?”

How fucking cute!

I was transferred back up to my home area of NJ/NYC  for work after living in DC for 4 ½ years. My offices are in Manhattan but I didn’t want to move in there just yet, I wanted to save $… so I ended up choosing my grandparents over my mom’s house and my dad’s house. Though it may sound like an odd selection, there is no place I’m happier when I hanging with them. On so many levels, watching them opens my eyes to my life. For example, they have to have the happiest marriage Ive ever seen. To know that happiness can still exist after 65 years of marriage amazes me. The fact is, that people want to go out to dinner with my grandparents all the time but they both choose to stay in because they rather just be with eachother alone.